Sunday, July 14, 2013

Ramadan Reading and Beyond + Reclaim Your Heart cont.





(put up notes from) Powerful Time Management Skills for Muslims by
The Marriage Procedure in Islam by




After Ramadan, but before uni. opens:
Prism by
Robin: Lady of Legend by
Silent Mercy (Alexandra Cooper #13) by



Treasure Island - Special Student Edition by
Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and; Through the Looking-Glass by
The Secret Garden (Barnes & Noble Classics) by

Reclaim Your Heart by Yasmin Mogahed cont.

One of the books that I am reading during Ramadan is Yasmin Mogahed's Reclaim Your Heart. Actually, I'm rereading it. I did a review on this book after I first read it in the beginning of the year, but I don't think I did it justice then. I really can't say enough good things about Yasmin and her book. (InshAllah she comes out with another book soon!) I decided to continue my "review" and go section by section including my personal GEM's (genuinely enlightening moments i.e. favorite parts/ what stood out to me). This is for those who wonder why I rave about her book so much and also for me to refer back to ;) ETA 7.23.13: I have finished Reclaim Your Heart and below are all my GEMs.

I highly recommend everyone give this book a chance and read it. But don't read it just to get through it. I suggest reading a section at the most a day. That way, you can actually digest the material and think about it. Fortunately, I have been able to find the articles on Yasmin's website so I have linked each one after the part I liked. This should be helpful to those who want to read her writing, but don't have a physical copy of the book. Nonetheless, read what you can and let me know in the comments below what stood out to you :)

Attachments
 
Why do people have to leave each other?
Like the loved one who hurts you again and again and again, the more dunya hurts us, the more we inevitably detach from it. The more we inevitably stop loving it. pg 17
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/11/13/why-do-people-have-to-leave-each-other/

People leave each other, but do they return?
Sometimes Allah takes in order to give. But, it’s crucial to understand that His giving is not always in the form we think we want. He knows best what is best. Allah says: “… But it is possible that you dislike a thing which is good for you, and that you love a thing which is bad for you. But Allah knows, and you know not.” (Quran 2:216) pg. 22
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/11/13/people-leave-each-other-but-do-they-return/

On filling the inner hole and coming home
Purpose. Everything has one. Nothing in the heavens or the earth or inside of me or inside of you is created without a purpose. No event in your life, no sadness, no delight, no pain, no pleasure… no loss, was created without a purpose. So just as we must read the ‘message inside the bottle’ of the sun and the moon and the sky, so too must we examine the messages in our own life experiences. pg. 26
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/11/13/on-filling-the-inner-hole-and-coming-home/

Emptying the vessel
If there is anything—or anyone—that losing would absolutely break us, we have a false attachment. pg. 29
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2010/12/07/attachments-emptying-the-vessel/

For the love of the gift
We all have needs and we all have wants. But our true suffering begins when we turn our wants into needs, and our one true need (God) into a commodity we think we can do without.  Our true suffering begins when we confuse the means and the End. God is the only End. Every other thing is the means. We will suffer the moment we take our eyes off the End and get lost in the means. pg. 33
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/11/13/for-the-love-of-the-gift/

Peace on a rooftop
That is the paradise that Ibn Taymiyyah, may Allah have mercy on his soul, spoke of when he said: ‘Truly, there is a Heaven in this world, [and] whoever does not enter it, will not enter the Heaven of the next world.’ pg. 37
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2010/05/27/peace-on-a-rooftop/

The ocean of dunya
As `Ali (ra) expressed beautifully, “Detachment is not that you should own nothing, but that nothing should own you.” pg. 39
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/11/13/the-ocean-of-dunya/

Take back your heart
This world cannot break you—unless you give it permission. And it cannot own you unless you hand it the keys – unless you give it your heart. pg. 43
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/11/13/take-back-your-heart/

Love
Escaping the Worst Prison
Many of us are also trapped inside the belly of the whale of our own desires and objects of worship. It is our own selves which we become enslaved to. And that imprisonment is the result of putting anything where only God should be in our hearts. In so doing we create the worst and most painful of prisons; because while a worldly prison can only take away what is temporary and inherently imperfect, this spiritual prison takes away what is ultimate, unending and perfect: Allah and our relationship to Him. pg. 50
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2010/11/13/escaping-the-worst-of-prisons/

Is This Love I’m Feeling?
So while ultimate happiness is everyone’s goal, it is often difficult to see past the illusions and discern love from hawa. One fail-safe way, is to ask yourself this question: Does getting closer to this person that I ‘love’ bring me closer to—or farther from—Allah? In a sense, has this person replaced Allah in my heart? pg. 52
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2009/11/13/is-this-love-im-feeling/

Love is in the Air
So often we think that Allah only tests us with hardships, but this isn’t true. Allah also tests with ease. He tests us with  na`im (blessings) and with the things we love, and it is often in these tests that so many of us fail. We fail because when Allah gives us these blessings, we unwittingly turn them into false idols of the heart. pg. 53
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2010/02/14/love-is-in-the-air/

This is Love
The lesson you’re taught is that the story ends at the wedding, and then that’s when Jennah (paradise) begins. That’s when you’ll be saved and completed and everything that was once broken will be fixed. The only problem is, that’s not where the story ends. That’s where it begins. That’s where the building starts: the building of a life, the building of your character, the building of sabr, patience, perseverance, and sacrifice. The building of selflessness. The building of love. And the building of your path back to Him... pg. 56
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2012/01/03/this-is-love/

Fall in love with the real thing
Why do we have so much trouble sacrificing what we love for what God loves? Why can’t we just let go of things? I think we struggle so much with letting go of what we love, because we haven’t found something we love more to replace it. pg 58
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2012/03/01/fall-in-love-with-the-real-thing/

A Successful Marriage: The Missing Link
Similarly, a man may question why he should show kindness and love towards even a disrespectful wife. To answer this question, one only needs to look at the example of Omar Ibn ul-Khattab. When a man came to Omar (who was Khalifah at the time) to complain of his wife, he heard Omar’s own wife yelling at him. While the man turned to leave, Omar called him back. The man told Omar that he had come to complain of the same problem that Omar himself had. To this Omar replied that his wife tolerated him, washed his clothes, cleaned his home, made him comfortable, and took care of his children. If she did all of this for him, how could he not tolerate her when she raised her voice? pg 64
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/01/04/a-successful-marriage-the-missing-link-by-yasmin-mogahed/

Hardships

Seeing Your Home in Jennah: On Seeking Divine Help
Indeed Allah does test those whom He loves and He tests in proportion to the level of faith. But so too does Allah send His Divine assistance whereby any test can be made easy and any fire can be made cool. So too can Allah send His Divine assistance whereby a single glimpse of His light and the home with Him can make us smile—even in the midst of the flames of trial. pg. 72
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/11/13/seeing-your-home-in-jennah-on-seeking-divine-help/

Hurt by Others: How to Cope and Heal
The ability to readily forgive should be driven by an awareness of our own flaws and mistakes towards others. But most of all, our humility should be driven by the fact that we wrong Allah every single day of our lives, when we sin. Who are we compared to Allah? And yet, Allah, Master of the universe, forgives by day and by night. Who are we to withhold forgiveness? If we hope to be forgiven by Allah, how can we not forgive others? It is for this reason that the Prophet ﷺ teaches us: “Those who show no mercy to others will have no mercy shown to them by Allah.” [Muslim] pg. 75
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2010/04/27/hurt-by-others-how-to-cope-and-heal/

The Dream of Life
God only gives good (nearness to Him) to good people, and bad (distance from Him) to bad people. The greatest good is nearness to God, in this life and the next. And it is only ‘good’ people who are blessed with this. That is why the Prophet ﷺ has said: “Strange is the case of a believer, there is good for him in everything—and this is only for the believer. If a blessing reaches him, he is grateful to God, which is good for him, and if an adversity reaches him, he is patient which is good for him,” (Muslim). pg. 78
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2010/11/23/the-dream-of-life/

Pain, Loss, and the Path to God
Hardships test us. But hardships can also be a blessing and a sign of Allah’s love. The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: “Whenever Allah wills good for a person, He subjects him to adversity”  [Bukhari]. And yet most people cannot fathom how adversity could possibly be good. Many do not recognize that hardship is in fact a purifier, which brings people back to their Lord. pg. 84
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2010/09/14/pain-loss-and-the-path-to-god/

A Believer’s Response to Hardship
As soon as we internalize that it is only a test, our questions drastically change. Instead of asking: “How could this be happening?” “Why is it so unfair?” our questions become: “How should I react?” “How should I pass this test?” “What am I meant to learn?” “How should I see through this illusion, to the creator of the one who’s hurting me, the one who’s oppressing me, and the test itself?” “How can we as a community use this test to bring us closer to our final destination, God?” and “How can we use this test to fulfill the purpose for which it was created - a tool to bring us nearer to Him?” pg. 88
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/03/15/a-believer%e2%80%99s-response-to-the-king-hearings/

This Life: A Prison or Paradise?
For the believing soul, it’s different. The believer is in prison—not paradise. Why? What is a prisoner? A prisoner is someone who is trapped. A prisoner is kept from his home. Stuck, while he wishes to be somewhere better. The worldly body is a prison for the believer, not because this life is miserable for the believing soul, but because that soul yearns to be somewhere greater. It yearns to be Home. No matter how wonderful this life is for a believer, it is a prison compared to the Perfect life that awaits them. This soul’s attachment is to God and the true paradise with Him. It wants to be there. But this worldly life is what keeps that soul from returning—for a while. It is the barrier, the prison. Although, the heart of a believer holds the only true paradise of this life, the soul still seeks what is beyond. The soul still seeks its Home. But this soul must remain in the bars of the body for an appointed term. It must ‘do the time’, before it can be released to go Home. The attachment of the believing soul is not to the imprisoning body. pg. 92
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/06/21/this-life-a-prison-or-paradise/

Relationship with the Creator

Salah: Life’s Forgotten Purpose
Consider for a moment what satan did wrong. He didn’t refuse to believe in Allah. He refused to make one sajdah. Just one. Imagine all the sajdahs we refuse to make.

Consider the seriousness of such a refusal. And yet, think how lightly we take the matter of salah. Salah is the first thing we will be asked about on the Day of Judgment, and yet it is the last thing that is on our mind. The Prophet ﷺ said: “The first thing which will be judged among a man’s deeds on the Day of Resurrection is the Prayer. If this is in good order then he will succeed and prosper but if it is defective then he will fail and will be a loser.” [Tirmidhi]

On that Day, the people of paradise will ask those who have entered Hell-fire, why they have entered it. And the Qur’an tells us exactly what their first response will be: ”What led you into Hell Fire? They will say: ‘We were not of those who prayed.’” (Qur’an, 74:42-43) pg. 98
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/03/01/salah-lifes-forgotten-purpose/

Salah and the Worst Kind of Theft
So it should be of no surprise to anyone that neglecting salah becomes the very first step in the path to a lower life. Those who have fallen off the path need only to look back at where it began; and they will find that it began with the salah. The same is perfectly true the other way around. For those who wish to turn their lives around, it begins by focusing on and perfecting the salah. Once you put salah back as the priority—before school, work, fun, socializing, shopping, TV, ball games—only then can you turn your life around. pg. 101
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2010/01/03/salah-and-the-worst-kind-of-theft/

A Sacred Conversation
We are told in the hadith qudsi: “Our Lord descends during the last third of each night to the lower heaven, and says: ‘Is there anyone who calls on Me that I may respond to him? Is there anyone who asks Me that I may give unto him? Is there anyone who requests My Forgiveness that I may forgive him?’” (Bukhari and Muslim) pg. 102
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/08/18/a-sacred-conversation/

The Darkest Hour and the Coming of the Dawn
Every moment of Ramadan is a chance to come back to Allah. Whatever we are now going through in our lives is often a direct result of our own actions. If we are humiliated, or feel low, it is our own sins which have lowered us. It is only by Allah that we can ever hope to be elevated. If we are consistently unable to wake up for Fajr, or if we find it increasingly difficult to stay away from haram (the forbidden), we must examine our relationship with Allah. Most of all, we must never be deceived. We must never allow ourselves to think that anything in this world succeeds, fails, is given, taken, done, or undone without Allah. It is only by our connection to our Creator that we rise or fall in life, in our relationship with our world—and with all of humanity. pg. 105
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/07/19/the-darkest-hour-and-the-coming-of-the-dawn/

Facebook: The Hidden Danger
In a profound hadith (Prophetic teaching), a man came to the Prophet ﷺ and said: “O Messenger of God, direct me to an act, which if I do, God will love me and people will love me.” He ﷺ said: “Detach yourself from the world, and God will love you. Detach yourself from what is with the people, and the people will love you.” [Ibn Majah]

Ironically, the less we chase after the approval and love of the people, the more we gain it. The less needy we are of others, the more people are drawn to us and seek our company. This hadith teaches us a profound Truth. Only by breaking out of the orbit of the creation, can we succeed with both God and people. pg. 113
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/02/27/facebook-the-hidden-danger/

This is Awakening
To protect yourself from this downward spiral, remember that the lows are part of the path. Remember that ‘futoor’ (the dip) is part of being human. Once you realize that this does not mean you failed or that you are a hypocrite (like Abu Bakr (RA) thought), you can keep from giving up once you get there. The key is to develop certain habits which become your ‘bare minimum’. That means no matter how you feel, how unmotivated, how low, you still do these things at the very least. You realize that when you’re at your low, it’s going to be harder, but you struggle to keep doing them. For example, the bare minimum is the 5 daily prayers at their appointed times. This should *never* be compromised no matter *how much* you’re ‘not feeling it’. They should be considered like breathing air. Imagine what would happen if every time you were exhausted or in a bad mood you decided not to breathe!

It is preferred to have other rituals that are part of the ‘bare minimum’. For example, stick to certain extra prayers and athkar or daily Quran—even if it’s little. Remember that Allah loves a small *consistent* action more than a huge inconsistent one. If you hold onto certain essentials during your ‘low’, you will ride the wave of iman and come back up, insha Allah. And, God willing, when you do go back up, you’ll be at a higher place than your last ‘high’. pg. 117
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2012/04/25/this-is-awakening/

Women's Status

A Woman’s Reflection on Leading Prayer
When asked, “Who is most deserving of our kind treatment?” the Prophet ﷺ replied, “Your mother” three times before saying “your father” only once. No matter what a man does he will never be able to have the status of a mother. pg. 126-127                                  http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2010/12/19/a-woman%e2%80%99s-reflection-on-leading-prayer/
Defining Manhood: The Facade of Being “Hard"
The Prophet ﷺ used to also help around the house, contrary to another widely held myth of masculinity. Aisha reported, “The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ used to stitch his clothes, milk the goats and help in the chores inside the house.” [Bukhari & Muslim] pg. 130
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/01/18/defining-manhood-the-facade-of-being-hard/

Ummah

Unspeakable Tragedy and the Condition of Our Ummah
The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said to his companions (radi Allahu `anhum): “The people will soon summon one another to attack you as people, when eating, invite others to share their food.” Someone asked, “Will that be because of our small numbers at that time?” He replied, “No. You will be numerous at that time: but you will be froth like that carried down by a torrent (of water), and Allah will take the fear of you from the hearts of your enemy and cast al-wahn into your hearts.” Someone asked, “O Messenger of Allah, what is al-wahn?” He replied, “Love of this dunya and hatred of death.” [An authentic hadith recorded by Abu Dawud and Ahmad]

The Prophet ﷺ here is describing a people who have become so completely engrossed in this life that it has made them selfish, materialistic, short-sighted, and heedless of their meeting with Allah. He is describing a people who have become so worldly that they have lost their moral character. pg. 141
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2010/06/08/palestine-an-unspeakable-tragedy-and-the-condition-of-our-ummah/

Today’s Opening of the Red Sea (Lessons from Egypt)
We must first conquer greed, selfishness, shirk, ultimate fear, love, hope and dependence on anything other than Allah. We must conquer hubb ad-dunya (love of dunya)—the root of all our diseases, and all our oppression. Before we can defeat the Pharaohs in our lives, we must defeat the Pharaoh inside ourselves. So the fight in Egypt is a fight for liberation. Yes. But liberation from what? Who is truly oppressed? Are you and I free? What is true oppression? Ibn Taymiyyah (ra) answers this question when he says: “The one who is (truly) imprisoned is the one whose heart is imprisoned from Allah and the captivated one is the one whose desires have enslaved him.” (Ibn al-Qayyim, al-Wabil) pg. 147
http://www.yasminmogahed.com/2011/02/09/egypt-musa-and-the-red-sea/
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