"Mommy, can you please play with me?" asked three-year old Julia. She had a stuffed panda clutched to her chest and was looking into the kitchen at her mom cooking.
"I'm sorry baby, but can you please ask your Dad in the living room? I need to finish this blueberry pie before Grandma comes over tonight," Mrs. Polo answered, looking at the time on her wristwatch. Julia made her way to the living room.
"Daddy, can you please play with me? Mommy's busy." She stood next to the arm of the couch watching her dad. Mr. Polo was on the leather couch with his foot up on an ottoman watching a baseball game on T.V. He looked hypnotized by the screen. She giggled at her dad's face, which got Mr. Polo's attention. He turned to look at his daughter.
"I'm sorry Julia, but Daddy is really tired. It was a long day at work and I need to relax a bit. I promise I'll play with you tomorrow though," Mr. Polo said and turned back to the T.V.
"Okay…" Julia said with disappointment. She dragged her panda back upstairs to her room and played by herself. It wasn't until she heard the doorbell ring about half an hour later that she went downstairs.
"There's my favorite girl," Grandma said as she hung up her coat. Julia ran to give her grandma a big hug, her brown curls jumping with her movement.
"Hi Grandma!" Julia screamed with delight. She clung to her Grandma's legs until she was picked up. "Can you please play with me? Mommy and Daddy are too busy," Julia pleaded. Grandma looked over at her daughter and son-in-law with a frown.
"Of course I will sweetheart, but let's eat dinner first. I'm starving and the food smells delicious," Grandma answered, giving Julia a kiss on the cheek and putting her down. The pair headed to the dining room hand in hand.
"Everything looks great Eva and the aroma coming from that chicken smells delicious! I see you made roast chicken and rice, and your favorite blueberry pie. You didn’t need to make all this for me. Pasta alone would have been good enough. But it is good to see that you know how to cook like your mother," Grandma said to Eva with a wink.
"It's been a long time since you came over Mom. You needed something special," Eva said with a smile as everyone sat down to eat.
"How's everything going with your new job in the city Nick?" Grandma asked as she cut into a slice of tender chicken.
"It's hectic working in the NYSE. I'll need some time to get use to the new atmosphere, but at least the pay is good."
"I can see you and Eva are doing fine financially, but how is everything going between you two?" Grandma asked looking from her daughter to son in law.
Eva hesitated to answer in front of Julia who was eating pasta. She had sauce all over her cheeks and her eyes were drooping for sleep. Eva looked at the grandfather clock behind Nick. It was almost 8:30. Eva quickly cleaned Julia's face and hands, and took her upstairs to bed. Today, Julia didn’t need a bedtime story. Instead, she fell fast asleep after a few minutes of being put to bed. Eva kissed her little princess goodnight and headed back downstairs to her mother and Nick.
"We've been thinking about getting a divorce, but Eva doesn’t want to go through with it," Nick said as Eva sat back down next to her mother.
"I don’t want to hurt Julia. She's only a little girl and I don’t want her to grow up without either parent and constantly having to visit the other for the rest of our lives," Eva said, looking from her mother to Nick.
"I understand what you mean dear," Grandma said, patting her daughter's pale hand on the table. Eva had been five when her parents had gotten a divorce.
"Many couples stay together for the sake of their children," Eva said looking at her husband.
"Yes, but that isn't a healthy marriage. Everyone is acting in an atmosphere like that where the parents can't stand each other and the kids know it and have to suffer in between. You of all people here should know that Eva," Nick replied. With that being said, dinner finished quickly. Eva put the dishes in the dishwasher while her mother chatted with Nick in the living room.
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Tiding up the kitchen, Eva thought of her childhood when her parents had gotten a divorce. At the time, she didn’t understand what was going on between her parents until one day, her father didn’t come back from work. That day turned into a few weeks before Eva's mother said they were going to visit her father. Eva was quiet during the whole car ride to her father's place. She was thinking about what to say to him. A half hour later, they stopped in front of an apartment building and made their way inside.
Eva's father was happy to see her. He opened the door and scooped her up to give her a bear hug like he always did when he came home from work. He let his ex-wife in and carried Eva in his arms. After some pizza, Eva sat on her father's lap and asked him why he moved away from home. She begged him to come back and said she really missed him. He said things weren't going well between him and Eva's mother and it was better this way. Seeing tears come down his daughter's face, he wiped them away and looked at Eva's mother for support. She bit her lip not knowing what to say to her daughter. How much should she say to a little girl? Would she even understand?
The truth was, Eva's mother had told her father to not come back home. She was tired of everything he was putting her through; his bad habits, coming home late from work, but most of all, the abuse. He would constantly yell and curse at her, like when she would tell him to pick up his dirty clothes or ask why he had come home late. Sometimes, it even went as far as him hitting her. She would feel helpless, not being able to make him change. She should have known better than that. You can't expect someone to change 360 just because of marriage.
Not being able to get things to work out between them, Eva's mother went to court to ask for a divorce. Her husband didn’t really argue, which made her wonder if he had wanted this for a while. After a couple of months, they both got what they wanted, freedom from each other. Unfortunately, Eva had to suffer in the middle. From then on, Eva lived with her mother and visited her father two weekends a month.
"Eva, your father and I have some personal issues between us. You're too young to understand now, but you will when you get older. I just don’t want to hurt you by lying."
An hour passed and Eva's mother finally took her daughter by the hand to leave. Eva gave her dad one last hug and they were out the door. The visits continued this way until Eva's last year at college and her mother got older. Eventually, Eva's mother told her the truth about her father. Time flew by and one day seven years ago, Eva had gotten news that her father died from a stroke. The pain of losing her father lasted a while, but was soon replaced once Eva met Nick at college.
At the time, Eva thought Nick was a dream come true. While they were getting to know each other, Eva felt herself getting attached to this man. He reminded Eva so much of her father too. Nick was gentle, understanding, smart, ambitious, had good manners, and always knew how to make her laugh. One day after a party at a friend's house, Nick confided in Eva that he wanted to marry her. So in two years time, they were happily married and within another year, were expecting their first child, Julia.
"Eva, come join us," her mother called from the living room, cutting short Eva's thoughts down memory lane.
Eva went to join her mother and Nick for some homemade blueberry pie. For a while, Eva forgot about her problems, seeing her mother and Nick enjoying their conversation. Eva's mother had been so happy at the news of her daughter's marriage to Nick. She truly believed Nick was a good man to have in Eva's life since losing her father. Little did they know what would come after the initial blissful months of marriage.
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"It seems to me that you and Nick have some issues," Eva's mother said.
"Yes mother, unfortunately we do…" Eva replied with a sigh.
"We want to work things out, but we don’t know where to start," Nick said.
"What you two need is some marriage counseling. I'm sure you both know that divorce rates are rising every year, but I really want you two to try and work things out. Take my friend's number and give her a call. She does counseling for couples," Eva's mother said, handing her daughter a card.
"Thanks Mom. I'll give her a call tomorrow morning." Eva's mother finished her pie and soon went back home while the Polo's retired to bed.
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On Saturday morning, Eva called the number her mother gave.
"Hello Mrs. Hill. This is Eva Polo and I was wondering if my husband and I could talk to you about our marriage. This afternoon at 2:00 would be perfect. See you then." Eva told Nick about the appointment and called her mother to ask if she could watch Julia. Afterwards, Eva went out to do some grocery shopping while Nick stayed home with Julia. When Eva came back within an hour to get ready for counseling, she found Julia coloring while Nick was talking to her.
"Julia, your Dad and I have somewhere important to go so you'll be staying with Grandma for the afternoon."
"Okay," Julia said with a smile.
Looking at her innocent little daughter made Eva hope for the best at today's meeting. After everyone got dressed, the trio got in their silver SUV and hit the road. Eva dropped Julia off at her mother's condo first before she drove off.
"Hello, Mrs. Hill. It's nice to meet you," Eva said, giving Mrs. Hill a firm handshake when the couple came into the office.
"It's nice to finally meet you two. To be honest, after your mother told me about your marriage, I was hoping to not see you in my office for counseling. But then again, what marriage is problem free? Anyway, how can I help? And please call me Jaclyn."
"Well, we've been married for almost five years. The first few months were nice, but I guess we both lost the enthusiasm of marriage," Nick said, looking from his wife to Jaclyn.
"That's typical of most marriages, unfortunately. But just like anything else in life, if we want to be successful at something, we need to work hard for it. In other words, if you two want a happy life together, then more effort needs to be put in by both of you. Since you are here, it obviously means you two want to stabilize your relationship, which is good. The 1st step to solving any problem is to acknowledge that one exists and have the desire to change. And trust me, counseling will be beneficial if that desire is strong. After all, where there is a will there is a way."
"It sounds like there is hope after all," Eva said sighing with relief.
"How much is the session?" Nick asked.
"Don’t worry about that. Eva's mother was a great friend to me when I was going through my own marriage crisis. Fortunately, things worked out for me and my husband with some help too. Seeing the difference some serious counseling could do to save a marriage made me want to help others in the same situation. The least I could do is help you and Eva. With a little guidance from me and some work on your part, the two of you can make this work out in time," Jaclyn said, giving Eva and Nick a bright smile.
"Where do we begin?" Nick asked hesitantly. He looked nervous, not believing that free counseling could make a difference.
"Let's begin with how your day usually goes."
"Well, we both work on the weekdays. Julia, our 3 year-old, stays at a daycare and my mother brings her home. She stays with Julia until we get back. By then, we're usually tired so after some dinner, we go to bed. That's basically what we do five days a week. On the weekends, we sleep in, get some chores done, and spend some time with Julia," Eva explained.
"Now, I need to understand the depth of your issues, so what exactly is bothering you two about the other?"
"The fact that I work like Nick, but I'm usually the one who comes home to cook and clean is frustrating. I'm just as tired working at the community college as he is working at the NYSE. Some help around the house would be nice. Not to mention appreciation for what I do," Eva said, looking at her husband.
"I don’t feel appreciated either. I come home from work hoping that it will be nice to spend some time with my family, but already things are tense," Nick commented with a frown.
"Neither one of you mentioned any sort of abuse, so I'm assuming we don’t need to worry about that," Jaclyn said looking at the pair.
"Eva told me about her parents and what she's been through in her childhood, so I try my best to learn from her father's mistakes and not put Eva through what her mother had to deal with," Nick answered.
"That's good to hear. Consider yourself fortunate for not having to deal with an abusive spouse," Jaclyn said to Eva.
"Thank God Nick respects me in that way," Eva said, smiling at her husband.
"From everything that has been discussed today, I think it won't be too hard for an improvement. As for your issues, first of all, it sounds like your family is lacking quality time together, especially some alone time for you two. Secondly, communication needs to occur more often. Let each other know what is bothering you. A simple thank you or token of appreciation wouldn’t hurt either.
As spouses and parents, both of you need to know your rights and responsibilities within a marriage. Unconditional love and respect will also better your relationship. You need to work together, even in the simple everyday tasks. These can surprisingly bring your family together more often than anything. Go out together once in a while and enjoy your life before you get older and busier. And don’t forget about your daughter. Never let a child suffer in between a marriage. It'll do more damage than you know. Drop her off at your mother's or at a friend's if you two want some time together, but also include her in family outings. New York is great for that!"
"Thank you so much for taking the time out to listen to our problems Jaclyn. I feel better having gotten that out," Eva said with a smile.
"My pleasure. Now I want you two to follow the advice I gave. Give me a call or better yet, stop by in a few weeks with news. I'd love to meet your baby girl too."
"We'll be sure to let you know how things are improving. Thank you again for your help!" Eva said rising to give Jaclyn a hug.
"See you three shortly then. Tell your mother I said "Hi" Eva."
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After the two hour session with Jaclyn, Eva and Nick went over to pick up Julia. Before going back home though, they stopped by Central Park. Spring was a beautiful time to go through the park and see all the beautiful colored plants and trees. People were taking pictures, riding bikes, painting scenery, and enjoying the fresh weather. Julia skipped with joy while Eva and Nick watched from behind.
Still unsure about the first step to take to improve his relationship with his wife, Nick tried in the littlest ways he could, now taking Eva's hand and giving it a gentle squeeze. Eva looked at his hand clutched to hers than at his face. Nick saw a smile coming across her face and he couldn’t help it, but he smiled as well. While he didn’t think about it, Eva was smiling inside as well as out, thinking about when Nick would do the same when they were first married. It's been so long, Eva thought.
On Sunday, the family went to church. Neither Eva nor Nick were religious so they hadn't gone since they got married. Nonetheless, they felt some spiritual guidance would help their family. The next few weeks went better than normal. Eva and Nick worked together around the house and outside, which put everyone in a good mood. Julia was definitely enjoying the change in her parents. She looked more bubbly and was excited for their weekend trips, Eva observed.
Eva and Nick took Julia and her Grandma to visit Jaclyn and update her on the good news. They told her about their trips to the American Museum of Natural History, Statue of Liberty, and Times Square. Nick happily showed pictures to Jaclyn of their trip, giving Eva and Julia a kiss on the cheek.
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Ten years later, Eva and Nick's relationship was rekindled. Although they had some arguments here and there, they tried hard to get past them. Julia and her twin brothers, Jason and Jeffrey brought joy to their parents. Julia herself was budding into a teenager. Although Julia's teen years were just beginning, Eva was thankful that Julia made it past the family's initial problems in one piece. A family picture sat on top of the living room fireplace and was a testimony to the changes that took place in the Polo family. Not only were there two additions to the family, but Eva, Nick, and Julia looked happier than they had in years.
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